Slacker Dad things to do

I have noticed in the past few weeks that some of my parenting practices are... unorthodox? Sure, that works.

Example:
The babies splash in the tub. They also lack comprehension of the English language. So when I say "Stop splashing," or "No splashing. Not nice", all they seem to hear is "...splash..." and just end up splashing harder.
My solution:
I splash back. That's right- I take a cup of water and I dump it over their heads. Or I reach my hand down into the water and splash a nice handful on them. It gets their attention, doesn't hurt them, and usually gets them to stop (but not all the time). I'm trying to think of a new scheme- something that will work every time. Any ideas? ;-)

Another:
When Seth was younger he liked to sit in my lap while I was trying to do things that required me to get up and down repeatedly, like building a computer. Obviously, it was difficult to get up and down with him on my lap.
My solution:
I gave him some specialized computer socket wrenches and gave him an old shell of a computer to work on while I worked on mine. He still has those wrenches and he goes and gets them sometimes when I need to work on some project that requires tools. Tools as toys? Sure, it's a little edgy, but it works.

I'll post more if more occur to me.