RTFM

I sometimes try not to use profanity, so I will not spell out what the acronym RTFM stands for, but a close approximation is “Read the Fool Manual”.

The type of “manual” I’m referring to is not the instructions on a bag of microwave popcorn or the ever-so-helpful directions on the liquid soap container. You can safely ignore those. No, I’m talking about the ones that matter- for example, the ones with detailed pictures or the ones written by someone you know personally.

If you grab those a-ma-zing Lego assembly instruction booklets and toss them out the window, you’re in for some trouble. You are GOING to have a stack of leftover pieces if you just “wing it” by looking at the picture on the front of the box. Read the doggone instructions- one stinking page at a time! Daggummit. RTFM.

If you are at work and someone hands you a document that you ask for because you’re trying to accomplish a task, how about you just read the thing and follow it- maybe even all of it. It’s not some poorly-translated “engrish fail” half-Korean, half-Sanskrit manual for a frying pan. No, it’s typically the product of hours of school-of-hard-knocks lessons. The author wrote the darn thing because he or she beat their head against a wall a few times and didn’t want to have to go through that mess all over again next year when they have to do their process again. RTFM, daggummit!

For any of you loyal readers that are asking yourselves “Why the rant? Don’t tase me, bro!” allow me to explain. I just sent an email with an attachment to a competent IT guy. He disregarded half of my instructions, which I dutifully repeated in my reply to his “this junk didn’t work” email. I wish that someone in his past had sat him down and told him, “Dude, RTFM. Every time. Daggummit. Seriously.”

So, consider yourselves all informed. I am officially sitting you all down and instructing you to pay attention, RTFM, and start doing that right now. Daggummit.